Who's Your Daddy? C.S.A

[Jason]

The following are all replies that British women have put on Child Support Agency forms in the section for listing father's details. These are genuine excerpts from the forms:

01. Regarding the identity of the father of my twins; child A was fathered by Jim Munson. I am unsure as to the identity of the father of child B, but I believe that he was conceived on the same night.

02. I am unsure as to the identity of the father of my child as I was being sick out of a window when taken unexpectedly from behind. I can provide you with a list of names of men that I think were at the party if this helps.

03. I do not know the name of the father of my little girl. She was conceived at a party at 3600 Grand Avenue, where I had unprotected sex with a man I met that night. I do remember that the sex was so good that I fainted. If you do manage to track down the father can you send me his phone number? Thanks.

04. I don't know the identity of the father of my daughter. He drives a BMW that now has a hole made by my stiletto in one of the door panels. Perhaps you can contact BMW service stations in this area and see if he's had it replaced.

05. I have never had sex with a man. I am awaiting a letter from the Pope confirming that my son's conception was immaculate and that he is Christ risen again.

06. I cannot tell you the name of child A's dad, as he informs me that to do so would blow his cover and that would have cataclysmic implications for the British economy. I am torn between doing right by you and right by the country. Please advise.

07. I do not know who the father of my child was as all squaddies look the same to me. I can confirm that he was a Royal Green Jacket.

08. Peter Smith is the father of child A. If you do catch up with him can you ask him what he did with my AC/DC CDs?

09. From the dates it seems that my daughter was conceived at Euro Disney maybe it really is the Magic Kingdom.

10. So much about that night is a blur. The only thing that I remember for sure is Delia Smith did a program about eggs earlier in the evening. If I'd have stayed in and watched more TV rather than going to the party at 146 Miller Drive, mine might have remained unfertilized.

11. I am unsure as to the identity of the father of my baby; after all when you eat a can of beans you can't be sure which one made you fart.

[wayneyboy1942]

:lol: But the CSA gets stick but I think that some fathers are dead beats
and need to be made to pay for their bit of fun! :whack:

[Mattylad]

Apparently, some "fathers" who are not even the real fathers are still having to pay when they find out that they have been hoodwinked & are not really the real fathers.

[silverscrim]

i agree with wayneboy, track them down and make them keep their kids instead of everybody paying for them

[takersbabe]

dont even get me started on the damned csa!!!!!me and my x had it sorted for 2 years (thats how long it took csa to actually sort ours out),he gave me money every month we were both happy with this,kids were sorted he bought them clothes and toys and stuff all going fine then THOSE idiots stepped in and took over.but thing is for a year now the money im supposed to get every month takes them 3/4 after he has paid it for them to send it me BEACAUSE THEY KEEP LOSING IT???????? EVERY MONTH FOR A YEAR THIS IS!!!! im on the phone every day for a week when its due it really winds me up because we didnt need their help.they are useless and ive told them as much.its annoying when you relying on this money to live. grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

[takersbabe]

apparently its being scrapped anyhow it really is a damned joke believe me.

[ollie]

I got awarded nothing for my son who was 15 and they asked if i would like it paid by giro or direct debit!

Originally Posted by takersbabe

apparently its being scrapped anyhow it really is a damned joke believe me.

[takersbabe]

exactly they have no idea whats going on. i rang them yetserday to try to trace my money now the office that deals with mine is either salford or birkenhead and i rang and "they were closed"????? got re directed to liverpool and they told me what i had asked last week and my office didnt know? so how can an office who doesnt deal with my claim know more than the office that does? and why werent they open?

buggers belief really????? IDIOTS!!